Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Questions Of Science

Right, reader it's time you gave something back to me. Everyday (or once a month) I spend hours preparing something to entertain you and now it's pay back time. Please can you help me solve these problems that leave me sleepless at nights.

1. The big cranes on building sites? How do they work, does a bigger crane come and assemble them in the night when no one is looking?

2. Can cat's get alzheimers? My cat, seems to be constantly eating. Either Whiskas are filling their pouches with crack or my cat keeps forgetting it's eaten.

3. June Sarpong?

If anyone get's all three right, they'll win a rake.


At 4:36 AM, Blogger MattJ said...

1) The boring answer is 'Yes'. they come in bits and they get put up. A more entertaining answer is that Building sites are merely naturally occurring environmentla phenomenon that spring up when ever a large fungal growth 'Turris Machina' emerges from fertile ground.

2) Cats are furry balls of mistrust. It constantly eats because it knows it costs money and wants to see you all destitute before it moves on to its next hapless victim.

3) She's genetically engineered by TV executives. The theory behind their Machiavellian scheme is working too. She first appeared on MTV in 1996, coincidentally when the channel really started to slip. Indoctrinatiing her viewers into a life of mediocrity, her cunnign overlords experienced their first success - viewers would watch any olf shit so long as it wasn't Sarpong. Then their greatest scheme - they ported her over to channel 4 - about the time of the Big Brother phenomenon. Everything looks fantastic i comparison so viewers where happy to watch such unmitigated shite because compared to her, it was great in their eyes! And thus reality TV and the decline of imaginitive, challenging programming began!

At 3:13 PM, Blogger Paddy Duncan said...

I'm afraid that your answer to number 2 was incorrect Matt, and so you don't win the rake. Next week, I'll ask another question and it can be a rollover, with the winner gettng the rake and also a trowel.

At 10:43 AM, Anonymous andy (i want a trowel) easton said...

give us the questions, i want a trowel and a rake


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