Sunday, May 21, 2006

Gotta Get Away From The City, It's Gonna Bring You Down

So I'm back in the rolling hills of the west country, whcih means that not much has happened. Because not much has occurred it doesn't give me much to talk about. However, I know how much you love to read my daily musings so I'm going to try and just waffle until you get bored and piss off.

So today, I'm going to talk about the average daily water consumption in Britain. Coming into these hot summer months I feel it's especially important to consider water consumption. The average Briton uses 150 litres of water a day while in Surrey they use a whopping 170 litres (what are you doing Matt?!). That seems a lot of water to me, so I'm going to give you some tips to cut down your water needs.

1. Don't flush the toilet.
2. Piss in the bushes (saves watering plants as well).
3. Drink more beer (more piss to water plants with) and stop drinking water.

That's all I can think of right now, so follow my advice and lets avoid a drought.


At 4:19 AM, Blogger MattJ said...

I have been following your Water Saving regime for some years in different areas of the country Paddy, I like to think that I lower the average in more ways than one in my own small way. Sadly teh wastrels down here apprarently frown on you if you stop ion the street and relieve yoursefl over someones aspidestras.

can you loan me the money for bail by the way?

At 8:42 AM, Blogger Paddy Duncan said...

Well I'm glad to see you're with me on this one Matt. However money's too tight to mention at the moment so I'll just offer you some advice instead. Either plead insanity or say you've got a problem with your kidney's which means when you gotta go, you gotta go.


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